I live in a world of other people. People who do not understand my pain, who silently nod their head in a fained attempt to embrace my journey.
So, at times I speak to deaf ears, mostly I seek my most in fears and give in like branches to the wind. I wish I wasn’t a statistical, mass incarcerated black man, I laugh when they say they’ll one day give back the Indians land. How am I to cope? When things such as my emotions, my anger, my past all jumble together only to become the slippery slope.
I feel the world has no time for me. Like when you arrive to green light only to have it magically turn red upon your approach. I’m on a passenger in life’s horse drawn coach. Protecting my far from solemn emotions with a weathered coat. But, just off the oblivion pier is a saving grace, a life boat. Unfortunately the person in operation of this small vessel is deaf, so I’ll silently hang myself with life’s rope.
There is a kid stuck in a well, or is it a sewer? I’ll let you decide. Either way, people walk over and around this terrified voice that screeches to the surface. He’s stuck in his own mental prison, his mental and unjustified incarceration. But why won’t those above acknowledge his face? Is it because he’s in the “other people’s” place? No, no. It’s because he vanished without a single trace.
He yelled for mom, couldn’t scream for dad for that was one person he never had. So sad, so sad that is. Until he had kids. Now that’s a hell of a story.
He came at night. Touching a thigh, removing air from the lungs, only to violate the most sacred of places. His place, now tears flow down the boys face. With a quickend heart rate the kids body could barely keep pace.
Lastly, he knows what it’s like to have and not have a mother. At times there were kisses and hugs. Other times there were only hugs, but in the pitch of a black night there were bugs. Her fists kissed his skull more than sunlight, his blood soaked into a flat pillow just under the moonlight. Between sobs, he could hear the night bird. It was then that little boy was no longer the unheard.
By Isaac Gathings.